Marathon

Absolutely not, anime girl with extremely valid concerns!

If you stumbled upon this article genuinely believing I'm about to dispense some long-distance foot race advice or relay a few interesting anecdotes on the topic, you are out of your mind. I have never nor will I ever advocate for something as recklessly dangerous as recreation.

Here's some free life advice for all you crazy sports types out there from one of the wisest men of our time:

Trump's views on exercise were mentioned in a New Yorker article this month and in "Trump Revealed," The Washington Post's 2016 biography of the president, which noted that Trump mostly gave up athletics after college because he "believed the human body was like a battery, with a finite amount of energy, which exercise only depleted."

As of the time this article was published, Trump is still alive. Therefore, what he said is correct.

Check mate, exercisists.

Besides, let me ask you something. Which of these sounds better to you: kicking back on a couch watching TV and consuming copious amounts of delectable food with your friends or family - optimizing for hedonism, essentially - or fucking running for hours?

Yeah. Exactly.

Anyway, click on one of the links below the title to continue.